


Sharpening Wits and Occluding Minds

by Wereflamingo



Series: Joy Verse [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: ADHD, Gen, Marauders, Marauders Friendship, Marauders' Era, Whomping Willow Incident
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-10
Updated: 2016-09-10
Packaged: 2018-08-14 07:17:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8003386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wereflamingo/pseuds/Wereflamingo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius has a problem thinking clearly. His friends try to help him out while dealing with the consequences of his rash actions. My take on the willow incident, the Marauders, and ADHD in the wizarding world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sharpening Wits and Occluding Minds

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story about Sirius, so naturally he's the only marauder whose POV is missing. 
> 
> This story is also about ADHD. I'd like to state that even if it may seem so, I am not in fact against medication, it's just that the available potion happens to not successfully cover Sirius's worst symptoms. 
> 
> Rating is mostly for swearing.
> 
> I'd like to thank my friend Katja for beta-reading. Unfortunately she only had time for one round, so the later edits are unbetaed and mistakes are all mine.

Peter Pettigrew had a brilliant idea. "Hey Padfoot!" he hissed at his friend Sirius, who was halfway out the door on his way to breakfast. "Wait a moment."

"What?" asked Sirius irritably, glancing at James and Remus who were already at the bottom of the stairs, chatting about something that sounded like homework but was probably related to the map, if James's enthusiasm was anything to go by.

"I wanted to talk to you about something. Come back in the dorm."

"This better be about either something very important or a prank on Prongs," said Sirius as he came back inside and closed the door, "which would also be very important, of course."

"It's kind of important, yeah. See, I couldn't help but overhear your exchange with Moony after you got us all caught last night..." he trailed off.

"Oh, that? That's nothing new. Just more of the same: 'Blah blah, Sirius never thinks, blah blah, look at me, I'm a prefect.'"

"See, I have something that might help if you're having trouble thinking clearly. I-"

"Is it weed?" interrupted Sirius. "Where are you getting it?"

"No, it's not weed," said Peter. "Stop derailing. I take it for class, which you don't need of course, you do great in class, but maybe for pranking nights?"

"What are you talking about, Wormtail?

"Wit-sharpening potion," said Peter nervously.

"Oi!" cried Sirius indignantly. "Are you calling me dim-witted?"

"No," said Peter patiently. He thought it best not to mention Sirius had just implied _Peter_ was dim-witted for needing the potion. "The potion won't make you bright if you're dim. It just helps you think more clearly. Focus, y'know. Eliminates the noise."

"And where are you getting that, then?"

"Madam Pomfrey. McGonagall recommended it back in third year and I've been taking it ever since."

"No fair," cried Sirius indignantly, "how come she never recommended any drugs for me?"

"Probably because you weren't failing her class," said Peter glumly. "Anyway, d'you wanna try it out? I get a dose for every day, including weekends, so I can do my homework, but I can take a Saturday off."

"Yeah, alright," said Sirius and threw his arm around Peter's shoulder, steering him towards the door. "Let's plan something epic this Saturday, and I'll take your potion. Help me think of something good enough to convince the others, yeah?"

Peter puffed up his chest and grinned. "Sure, Pads, we'll think of something great." He was pleased to share a secret with Sirius and made sure to make a show of arriving late at breakfast together, giving James a secretive smile when he asked where they'd been.

 

* * *

 

Sirius taking Peter's weekend doses became a routine. James and Remus were astounded with his increased pranking productivity, but so far he had not been caught, and neither, for that matter, did he get himself or anyone else caught by Filch or McGonagall. One fortunate effect of the potion was increased patience, exemplified best every time Sirius ran into Slytherins while roaming the halls looking for trouble. When on the potion, Peter noticed, Sirius became gloriously difficult to bait.

Of course, more than anyone else, the marauders were likely to run into Snape. Remus was sure he was following them on purpose, and Peter was beginning to agree. However, while James still needed some restraining, Sirius would reply to Snape's toxic remarks with a bored air:

"Yes yes, Snivellus, we are all aware you're blood-purist scum, no need to insult Remus again, I doubt he cares what you think. Run along now."

Unfortunately, Sirius's success made Snape even more vicious every time they faced him. At first it was only a fight or two, a few detentions, but Peter was getting worried. He was contemplating talking Sirius into quitting the potion, or refusing to supply it, although that would probably be pointless, as Sirius was certainly capable of brewing it.

On the night of the full moon, Sirius left dinner early, as per usual. He never had much of an appetite on full moon nights, being too worried about Remus. Peter hoped they could achieve their animagus transformations soon, which would hopefully make things easier for Remus himself, as well as ease all their worry. All three of them already knew their forms, which earned them each a new nickname, and Peter himself was quite proud of his tail, ears and whiskers.

James had left even earlier than Sirius because McKinnon had cruelly scheduled Quidditch practice halfway through dinner time. Worried, Peter hurriedly finished his meal, even skipping dessert, to go find Sirius. He should tell James about the potion, he thought. If Peter can't talk sense into Sirius on his own, he will definitely tell James.

Luckily enough, Peter ran into Sirius right in the entrance hall.

"Hey there Wormy," said Sirius, suspiciously cheerful, "I was just coming to find you! I just pulled our best prank yet on Snape. You gotta hear this. He's going to piss his pants!" He bounced on the spot gleefully.

"Did you?" said Peter worriedly. "What did you do?"

"See, he was being a right bastard again, saying some nasty stuff about our Moony and trying to find out where he went, like it's any of his bloody business. I was getting really fucking pissed, wanted to shut him up once and for all, so I figured if he really wants to know, it would serve him right. Would put him off sticking his huge oily nose-"

"Sirius," Peter interrupted, "what did you do?"

"Easy," Sirius grinned, "I just up and told him- Oh shit, Peter," his grin disappeared, replaced by a panicked expression. "Peter, I told him!"

"You told him about- you know?" asked Peter, alarmed.

"No, I told him how to get through the willow."

"You what?!"

"Oh. Shit shit shit shit!" Sirius cursed as he was pulling the castle door open.

"Where are you going?" Peter was panicking.

"After him! He could die!"

"So can you! Sirius!" but it was no good, Sirius was already running out the door. "I'm going for Dumbledore!" Peter yelled after him. Only Dumbledore could maybe fix this mess. Peter's terror powered him all the way to Dumbledore's office.

 

* * *

 

James Potter was at Quidditch practice, when he noticed something odd on the grounds. He could see wandlight shining in the distance, moving towards the Whomping Willow. Considering the moon had already risen, and Madam Pomfrey always led Remus to the willow in total darkness to avoid being noticed, something was definitely wrong. He didn't even notice he was flying off the pitch until he was halfway to the willow, which he could now see had stopped moving. The wandlight illuminated a familiar figure, and James cried out "Snape!", but it was too late. He had disappeared down the tunnel.

By the time James was at the willow, it was moving again. James conjured a practice bludger-sized ball with the spell they used for try-outs and threw it hard at the knot, but it was blown off-course by a branch.

"What's going on, Potter?"

"McKinnon!" cried James, surprised. He didn't realize he was being followed by his captain, but of course he was. "Not now, help me out!"

McKinnon handed him her beater's bat and started pitching practice balls at him. The third one hit the mark.

"Don't you dare follow me!" he yelled back at McKinnon as he was flying towards the tunnel. "Get everyone back to the castle, stay on your brooms!"

He could see her hesitating, and he could understand, but this was no time for pulling rank. "Go! And get Dumbledore!" he yelled before diving into the tunnel.

Inside, he could see the light ahead of him. "Snape!" he yelled again. "Get back! It's dangerous!"

Snape paid him no mind, despite the noises coming from the end of the tunnel. James could tell the wolf was throwing itself at the door. James was gaining on him quickly when he heard a loud growl, and a crash. Snape stopped dead, apparently frozen in fear, and soon James could see why. The wolf was terrifying. That was not Remus, that was a beast, and he was planning to spend entire nights with it.

But there was no time to think of that. "Flipendo!" he yelled, and the wolf flew back through the open doorway. He pushed past Snape, who came to his senses and began to run. James cast another Flipendo at the wolf, who was running back at them, and then levitated the broken door back into its place, concentrating hard to keep up the levitation while he cast a Reparo at it, a sticking charm, and four locking charms in quick succession. The wolf was throwing itself at the door again and James could finally spare a sympathetic thought to Moony and how bad that was going to hurt the next day, because the door was holding up successfully. He threw in the specialized marauder locking charm for good measure and sped back down the tunnel after Snape.

"Get on the broom," he ordered when he reached him. Snape did not argue. "What the hell were you doing here? How did you know how to get in?"

"Your friend Black told me how," Snape spat out.

"He what?!" James was bewildered and furious and his heart was still beating too hard.

Snape didn't answer.

Flying out the willow, James could see a figure running towards them and was about to yell at whoever that was to get back up to the castle, when he realized it was Sirius.

"James!" cried Sirius, falling to his knees, panting, his face as white as a sheet.

James pulled up next to him and hit him upside the head. "The fuck did you do?!" he yelled. "Get back to the castle. I sorted it out but you'd better get inside just in case."

Sirius got to his feet. "Peter went for Dumbledore," he offered feebly.

"I sent McKinnon. Now-"

Just then, the castle doors opened and Dumbledore came out with McGonagall and professor Smith, their DADA teacher.

 

* * *

 

Remus Lupin was woken, as usual, by Madam Pomfrey, the school matron. Not as usual, James Potter stood over her shoulder.

"James?" he croaked. "What are you doing here?" His friends were not supposed to let on that they knew where he went, let alone how to get inside.

"He had to unlock the door for me," explained Madam Pomfrey, who was already looking him over worriedly. This only caused Remus to become more confused.

"I was the one who locked it last night," said James.

Remus looked to Madam Pomfrey, who he remembered locking him in.

"It, ah, needed locking again," explained James. "Don't worry, nobody's hurt!"

Madam Pomfrey tsked at James. "I'm afraid that is not the most reassuring way to tell the story, Mr. Potter." Remus didn't think there was a reassuring way to tell a story like that.

Madam Pomfrey continued. "Remus, dear, do try to remain calm. A student went through the tunnel last night, and Mr. Potter here went after him. I assume you smelled them, and that's why you broke down the door. There weren't supposed to be any humans this close to you, although of course we will strengthen the wards after this. It's our fault that you managed to break it."

Remus stared. James picked up again. "As I said, everyone is safe now, except for a bit of a shock, and your own injuries. Are they worse than usual?" Remus did not reply, but James didn't wait either. "I got you locked in, got us out, sent the Quidditch team back to the castle too. They weren't there by the time we were back out but I hear they came in through the common room window. Gave Evans a fright," he smiled weakly. "Anyway the whole castle was in early curfew just in case, professors in the entrance hall, very safe." He looked at Remus expectantly. Was he waiting for Remus to approve the safety measures? Remus's brain was still fuzzy.

"That's enough, Mr. Potter, you'll tire him out speaking so fast." They both helped him up to the castle, and as he was catching his breath, Madam Pomfrey shooed James out.

"Wait," said Remus feebly. "James, wait."

James turned, although he seemed reluctant. "Yeah, Moony?"

"Wh-who went through the willow?"

"Snape."

Remus felt dizzy. "You said he's safe? Did he see?"

"Yeah, he's safe, but he did see. He won't tell though, Dumbledore promised. I don't know what he told him, he sent us all out, McGonagall included."

"That's enough, Mr. Potter," said Madam Pomfrey. "It's time for you to leave."

"Wait," said Remus, almost begging. "Just... how did he know?"

James looked away.

"James?"

"Mr. Potter!"

"Madam Pomfrey," said James, "you can't expect me to tell him and then leave! Or do you expect him to just stew in it, not knowing?"

Madam Pomfrey sighed. "Alright, I suppose it'll do you no harm if I keep you here a little longer. But after you're done clearing that up, you'd better get back in bed and be quiet. In fact, you both better go to sleep."

"James?" said Remus again, ignoring her.

"It was Sirius. He told him. Thought it was a prank, or so Peter tells me. Was telling it to him like it was a lark, until his brain caught up to his mouth and he ran for the willow. We met him on our way back to the castle, white as a sheet and panting."

Remus was staring at James in disbelief.

"I know it's a lot," said James. "I don't expect you to forgive him, and I won't tell you he's sorry because I know you know he is. Let's sleep for now, ok? I have the bed next to yours, didn't get much sleep last night," he chuckled. "Got treatment for shock and everything. That's Snape sleeping over there," he pointed to the bed on the other end, which had its curtains drawn, "he got it too."

"James," said Remus again.

James came closer. "What is it Moony?" he asked quietly.

"What will happen to me?"

"What?"

"I almost killed someone. What will happen to me? Are they handing me in to the ministry? Do I have to leave the school?"

"I-I don't think so." said James, surprised. "It's not your fault. Sirius got detention indefinitely - yeah, I know, right? - and lost fifty points. Don't worry, I gained them back for saving Snivellus. Who by the way also lost points, for going near the willow in the first place, especially after several professors told him to stop snooping. But you didn't do anything wrong."

"It doesn't work that way, James."

"Look, Snape isn't going to tell, and neither is Dumbledore, after all the trouble he went to to get you here. Let's sleep, and then you can talk to Dumbledore, okay?"

Remus went to sleep with a heavy heart.

 

* * *

 

Three days later, after Remus made a casual joke at Sirius's expense, Sirius snapped.

"Remus," he said stiffly, "can we talk in the dorm?" James shot a stinging hex at him, and Peter hurried to copy him, but neither made any comment.

Remus said nothing, but gathered his things from the common room sofa he was occupying, and started for the stairs. Sirius followed him.

"Well?" said Remus as the door closed.

Sirius sighed. "Remus, why do you act like nothing happened?"

"Excuse me?"

"It's not right, you shouldn't be joking around with me. You should be angry. You should refuse to talk to me! You should hex me like James and Peter."

"Sirius, I won't alleviate your feelings of guilt with petty punishment."

"But you won't forgive me either."

"No, and if you really care, you won't ask me to. I don't want to forgive this. Forgiveness is like punishment, it makes you feel like it's all okay now, but it's not. You can't fix this. It's done." 

"Okay," said Sirius. "I will not ask you to forgive this. But what can I do? How can I make up for it?"

"Be better. Whatever's going on with you, fix it."

"There's nothing going on with me," said Sirius stubbornly.

"Oh yeah?" said Remus, starting to feel angry. "Then how come you go from cool and collected to wild and reckless? How come you do something like _this_?"

"I- I can't blame this on it. But I'll tell you about the first part."

"Go on, then," said Remus, surprised Sirius actually did have some sort of answer. His question had been purely rhetorical.

"I've been taking wit-sharpening potion."

Remus gaped at him.

"I've been getting it from Peter. That's how I stay all cool. The other night I hadn't taken any."

"Why-"

"It isn’t supposed to make you smart, it just helps you think clearly. Something you know I sorely lack."

Remus did not reply. It was true.

"I should take it all the time," Sirius said suddenly. "I should ask McGonagall. Or Madam Pomfrey. Or I could brew some."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Sirius, you can't take it all the time."

"Wormtail does."

"Does he? Well, I doubt he takes it in the evening, or before breakfast."

"How do you know?"

"You can't sleep after taking wit-sharpening potion. And you have to eat something first. We learned about it in Potions last year, remember?"

"There's one night a month I won't need to sleep soon enough," said Sirius, with a choked laugh.

Remus was confused. What doesn't he know about? "What are you talking about, Padfoot?"

Sirius's eyes widened. "I wasn't supposed to say anything until we were all done."

"What is it?"

"Remember how we told you we picked the nicknames for the map according to the animal each of us resembles? Well, it might have been more literal than we led you to believe. Sorry we had to reject your rather excellent suggestion of pelican for Peter, by the way." Sirius laughed nervously.

"Get to the point, Sirius."

"We-we did something for you. Prongs and Wormtail are still working on it, and I only just succeeded last night. I haven't been able to sleep much these last few days."

"Well?" asked Remus, intrigued.

"Ok," said Sirius. "Here we go." And suddenly, where Sirius had stood a moment earlier, there was now a large black dog.

"Wh-" Remus stared, wide eyed.

Sirius changed back. "It's for your transformations," he said. "Werewolves only prey on humans, so we're going to turn into animals so we can be there with you."

"You- You did this for me?" Remus wasn't sure he was willing to endanger his friends, even transformed, but that they would be willing to do it, that they found a solution and went to all that trouble, that was incredible.

Sirius nodded.

"How?" demanded Remus, bewildered. "How can you do something that enormously dangerous and brilliant for me, and then sell me out like you did?"

"The keywords here are 'enormously dangerous' and 'brilliant'," said Sirius with a humorless laugh.

"Right."

"I wish I could _not do_ something enormously dangerous for you," said Sirius glumly. "I can never seem to manage that."

"Try harder."

"I don't know how, though. It just happens, an idea pops into my head and I don't realize it's dangerous until I've already done it."

Sirius's choice of phrasing caused something to click for Remus. "I may have an Idea," he said. "Let me talk to Dumbledore first."

Remus had been receiving private occulmency lessons from Professor Dumbledore. It was supposed to help him keep his secret, although with everything that was going on outside the castle walls, Remus suspected there might be another reason. It occurred to him that occluding could help keep those random ideas out - in fact, he was quite sure his own impulse control improved immensely since he started practicing occulmency.

Unfortunately, Dumbledore was no help. He did suggest, however, that Remus teach Sirius himself, which he indeed decided to do. The task seemed impossible at first, but three weeks later Sirius was noticeably better at self-control, and even his mood lifted.

Surprisingly, Snape did not lay off at all. Remus would have thought Snape might be scared of him now, but he wasn't. He just hated them all more than ever, claiming they had tried to kill him, even though only Sirius was at fault and even he, Remus knew, just hadn't thought it through. Remus tried to be sympathetic, reminding himself the boy was almost killed, but it was hard to be sympathetic towards someone who hated him for something he couldn't control. He knew that was the common attitude towards werewolves, and many others would treat him much the same if they knew, but knowing it and experiencing it were two very different things. Eventually he gave up, and gave his friends free rein to prank Snape to their hearts' content, as long as they kept to _harmless_ pranks.  

Remus himself ignored Snape, but he had his own pranking fun. Since he was no legilimens, he chose to employ Confundus for Sirius's training. Sirius was getting better, but Remus had already managed to get him to wear eyeliner, chase his tail in the dorm, do handstands in the great hall, and steal McGonagall's hat. The genius in it was that nobody noticed, seeing as none of those things were that unusual for Sirius. Eventually, though, he got busted by James.

"I know that was your doing, Moony. He'd never have spelled all the dishes neatly to one side before jumping on the table, he'd just go for it."

"Maybe he's developing a conscience," said Remus innocently.

"I highly doubt it," said James, grinning.

Just as Sirius was returning from getting a scolding from McGonagall for his tabletop dance act, the owls flew into the great hall. A large owl dropped something that looked like a magazine on Sirius's head. Sirius positively squealed. "It's here!"

"What is?" asked Remus.

"Come on back to the dorm and I'll show you," said Sirius, hiding the item in his robes.

"Is that a dirty magazine?" asked Peter suspiciously. At this point of the month, Remus rather hoped it was.

"You already know what it is, Pete, I told you about it."

Peter looked perplexed, but James's eyes lit up. "Is it in there?" he asked. Remus frowned. Was he the only one who didn't know?

Sirius peeked into his robes, and nodded enthusiastically.

When they reached to dorm, Sirius offered the magazine to Remus. "You don't have to read it," he said. "It's not exactly pleasant reading."

"What is?" asked Remus, and then froze. It was the latest copy of the Quibbler, and the cover story was titled 'Werewolves - a History of Discrimination, Lies and Abuse', by 'Anonymous'. "Sirius? Did you write this?"

Sirius nodded. "I wrote most of it in detention with McGonagall. She had me writing essays about werewolves and how tough you have it - restrictions, punishments, the works. She was great, brought in all those books I've never seen in the library, and even ministry records - stuff that is available to the public, but I can't very well go there for a copy in the middle of the school year, can I?"

"And then you published them in the Quibbler?"

"Yeah. It was her idea, after she made me rewrite all the essays into one big essay. Unfortunately I had to make it anonymous because of the last chapter."

"Oh?"

"The last chapter was my idea. Those books had all those awful lies in them, it was making me sick. So I wrote an account of my acquaintance with a werewolf and which of the things people say are just myth or plain old lies. I even quoted Madam Pomfrey anonymously, sorry if I went a bit too personal there."

Remus gaped at him. Sirius, adding extra detention for himself?

"So, obviously," Sirius continued, "I couldn't risk people realizing the werewolf friend was you so I had to hide my own identity too."

"I-" said Remus, but found he had no idea how to continue.

"I've read it," said James, "it's really good."

Remus opened the magazine. "Sirius, this is half the issue!"

Sirius stared at his feet. "Look, this is much more interesting than homework. This is important. This is your life, and it's not fair. I'm not going to ask your forgiveness again, but I will tell you that I understand better now how dangerous what I did was for you."

"Bloody hell," said Peter. "That woman really knows what she's doing, doesn't she?"

"Aye, Wormtail," said James. "That she does. Oh, by the way, what was it that you wanted to show us?"

"Oh, right," said Peter, his eyes lighting up, and promptly disappeared. In his place stood a fat grey rat.

Sirius whooped. James grinned. Remus, although worried, couldn't help but smile. Peter was the last to complete his transformation, James achieving his only a few days prior.

"We're coming with you this month!" cried Sirius excitedly. He turned into a dog and lapped at Remus's hands, before running off in chase of Wormtail, who squeaked and fled under his bed.

James clapped Remus on the shoulder, smiling. "See, Moony? It's all getting better. You're gonna be alright," he said. And mostly, Remus believed him.


End file.
